Dangerous Dan

If you haven't checked out PETA's anti-fishing site, then you haven't seen real crazy in action. It's the usual tripe you would expect from PETA and they try to use scare tactics to keep you away from fish (they're filled with toxic radioactive bacteria that poop mercury!). The really entertaining part, though, is their leaflet "Your Daddy Kills Animals." Here's a look:

Take a moment to look at the maniacal look on the father's face and laugh.

Here's what the back of the leaflet says:

Imagine that a man dangles a piece of candy in front of you. You love candy so you reach for it. But, as you grab the candy, a huge metal hook stabs through your hand and you're ripped off the ground. You fight to get away, but it doesn't do any good… You’d feel really scared, wouldn’t you? That would be an awful trick to play on someone, wouldn't it?

But guess what?

YOUR DADDY PLAYS THAT SAME WICKED TRICK ON FISH AND FISH GET SCARED TOO!
…
Your daddy waits until hungry little fish are tricked by what looks like a tasty lunch.
…
Since your daddy is teaching you the wrong lessons about right and wrong, you should teach him that fishing is killing and killing is wrong.

Until your daddy learns that it's not "fun" to kill, keep your doggies and kitties away from him. He's so hooked on killing defenseless animals THAT THEY COULD BE NEXT!

PETA… bringing families closer together.

I can just imagine a little kid coming home and hiding Muffin and Spot in the closet to keep them away from dad and then breaking out in tears when he asks where they are. Here's how it would go:

Dad: "Where's Spot? It's suppertime"
Kid: "*sob* I… don’t… *snot choke*… want you… *snot choke*… to kill them! *sob , sob*"
Dad: "WHAT?!"

PETA clearly gets many donations from family therapists.

One of PETA's other sites is JesusVeg, which tries to make a religious case for the vegan life. Given FishingHurts, though, this concerns me. Jesus was, after all, a fisher of men and several of his disciples were fishermen. He also went fishing and helped fishermen bring in enormous hauls of fish. And then there was that time when he separated the loaves and fishes, which everybody chowed down on.

Kid: "Jesus… is… *snot choke*… coming after… Muffin! *sob , sob*"
Minister: "WHAT?!"
Kid: "He already went after the fish! *snot choke, sob, sob, sob*"

PETA clearly gets many donations from atheists.

Don't just stop your PETA tour with FishingHurts and JesusVeg, though. Check out their other fine sites!

There's:

-Chris P. Carrot's 2004 presidential site featuring the slogan "Eat me!"

-The Lettuce Ladies featuring chicks who tour the country wearing lettuce clothing, begging the pick-up line, "Why don't we get some Ranch, go back to my place, and see where things go?" Most of the Lettuce Ladies are babes and you need to check out their turn-ons and turn-offs. Kayla (who is a non-babe and actually looks a little man-ish) says she's turned off by "flesh-breath" and also "runs in her nylons." It's the important things, people! I wonder if eHarmony has "flesh-breath" as a preference option?

Lettuce Lady Brandi. Two-Island dressing anyone?

-MilkSucks. Its take-off on Garbage Pail Kids is not to be missed.

-Then, finally, there's the anti-fast food sites, McCruelty, Murder King, Kentuckey Fried Cruelty, and the best, Wretch's Old Fashioned Murderers featuring Wendy as Chucky.

For the record, I ate my first veggie hot dog this past weekend. Or rather, I ate my first half of a veggie dog as the second half went uneaten… it wasn’t very good. It would have been much better with some mysterious pork and beef parts in it. That’s the problem with vegetarianism – animals are so darn tasty!

Question: Are these pictures of PETA protestors or are they of complete frickin' loonballs?

Correct Answer: Yes.

Cripes, couldn't they have gotten the Lettuce Ladies for that second picture?

The World Toilet Summit was held this week in Belfast. Among the developments:

…the unveiling of Belfast's first public UriLift toilet, a stainless steel urinal that rises hydraulically out of the ground at night to facilitate male revelers.

Yeah, they're drunk, people. They can't hit the thing when sober, you think their aim will be any better when sloshed? You're just guaranteeing more pee on the sidewalk. But at least the urinals will stay clean.

No word on whether the summit came to a resolution concerning North Korea's plans for a nuclear-powered port-o-john.

The Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence has set its sights (tee-he) on Florida's new "shoot first" law. In case you're not familiar with it, a law was passed that allows citizens to shoot people who are assaulting them before first attempting to run away in a desperate panic, scream in a desperate panic, and cower in a fetal position in a desperate panic. Naturally, gun control folks don't like this law because it may increase the use of guns in killings. Granted, the increased use will be against violent assailants, but it's with GUNS! Can't have that. Thus, the group has launched a tourist awareness program to alert visitors to Florida of the increased risk of being shot.

So, pay attention! If you're a prospective murderer, assailant, or rapist, you're now more likely to get shot in Florida. The Brady Campaign is providing a valuable service in alerting violent felons to the potential danger to their safety. Everybody else can ignore it.

Biologists have observed gorllias using simple tools in the wild. We've already seen chimpanzees and orangutans use tools.

It's only a matter of time now.

First enslavement… and then man-ape love?

Not long ago, I discussed developing technology that will turn your home electrical system into a home network through which you can get internet access. Well, it's getting closer. Japan's Matsushita company (it's important never to incorrectly abbreviate 'Matsushita') have developed a microchip that will accomplish this with nothing more than a special adapter that you plug into the outlet and then you plug the appliance into the adapter.

I predict this will be big. When it ultimately gets to the implementation phase, expect cable and phone companies to do some big-time lobbying of various politicians. They'll likely try to get the upstart technology heavily regulated through shoddy excuses about the competitive environment, the tech’s effectiveness, or even its safety. Whatever it takes to strangle a new competitor in the cradle.

Fortunately this doesn't always work. Thomas Edison fought mightily against the adoption of alternating current because he was heavily invested in direct current. Despite the obvious advantages of AC, he made wild accusations about its safety and even put on public demonstrations:

Edison went on to carry out a campaign to discredit and discourage the use of AC. Edison presided personally over several electrocutions of animals, primarily stray cats and dogs, for the benefit of the press to prove that his system of DC was safer than that of AC. Edison's series of animal executions peaked with the electrocution of Topsy the Elephant.

He could have at least fried a cow so he could have distributed cooked steaks afterwards (you can see a video of Topsy getting executed here). Anyway, Edison lost.

The NCAA denied the University of North Dakota's final appeal to be allowed to use their 'Fighting Sioux' name and logo. Caving to pressure from Native American interest groups, the NCAA has been cracking down on schools that use Indian mascots. Most are generic (Indians), several use tribe names (Choctaws), and then at least one is a tad overboard (Southeastern Oklahoma State University Savages). The NCAA's decision is especially a problem for UND because its championship hockey team plays in the almost brand new (and very fancy) Ralph Englestad Arena, which has the Fighting Sioux logo in about 2,000 different places. According to the NCAA, UND will have to cover up all those logos when the school hosts regional games in March.

If a team name is the Savages, then ok, maybe you have a case for changing it. In most cases, though, the names are used respectfully (at least nowadays) and surveys of Native Americans have consistently shown that the majority don't have a problem with the practice. As usual, it's a vocal minority who are creating a tempest in a teapot and who think themselves enlightened about the malevolence of the practice while the rest are brainwashed. Although, UND's case was hampered somewhat when the local Sioux tribes endorsed a name change (some tribes, like the Seminoles, endorsed schools using tribal names and so the NCAA backed off). If you look at the statement, though, their guff isn't so much with the fact that the school is using an Indian name as it is that they don't like the name 'Sioux' because it's derived from a French pejorative term and they are Lakota, Dakota, and Nakota Indians:

The Sept. 8 vote came after a United Tribes summit in Bismarck, N.D. The group endorsed a resolution that states, "The name 'Sioux' is derived from a French word which is pejorative in nature and which is offensive to the Tribal Nations who are comprised of people of Lakota, Dakota and Nakota ancestry."

I had to do some leg work on this one. 'Sioux' is derived from the French term Nadouessioux, which was just the French transliteration of an Ojibwa tribe pejorative for the D/L/Nakotas, Na:towe:ssiw and this apparently meant something along the lines of 'enemy.' 'Dakota,' et al mean 'allies.' So 'Sioux' is a shortened form a French term adopted from a terse name used by another tribe. (Not surprisingly, many tribes had unpleasant nicknames for other tribes. According to this, most were fond of calling the Dakota Indians 'cutthroats' and 'beheaders.')

At any rate, the tribe didn't like 'Sioux' being used. Fine. Presumably, if UND changed the name to the 'Fighting Dakotas,' it would be ok?

As for the logo, it's actually pretty respectful:

In fact, most of the logo’s past versions have been respectful, with the possible exception of the fourth one.

From what I can tell, the tribes didn't even say anything about the logo, but per the NCAA, it will have to be covered up all the same.

I'd tell you to read the USA Today article over this issue, but it's exceptionally unbalanced. It quotes several people opposed to the mascot's name (and references "other opponents"), but the writer seemingly couldn't find a single person to speak in favor of it, which only indicates he didn't bother looking, or didn't care to find them. This guy found somebody.

One opponent spouts nonsense like this:

"The Ralph is a symbol of power," says Donna Brown, assistant director of the school's American Indian Student Services. "It is a symbol of power, Ralph Engelstad's power and the power of the money he had. It sends a clear message to people who oppose the nickname and logo that there's nothing you can do. You're not going to change that name. It was meant to be a constant reminder to us that he won."

Having studied oppression theory, I can tell you that people in the oppression business think everything is about power and they can find symbols of it in damn near everything. They're like psychological/existential conspiracy theorists. So this means nothing to me.

What's amazing is that activists expend enormous amounts of time and effort on trying to get rid of these nicknames when they could be using their talents for something useful. Say, housing, jobs, education, etc. Students at reservation schools will take little comfort in knowing UND doesn't use 'Fighting Sioux' when they need computers.

Going back to the logos, compare the Fighting Sioux with Chief Wahoo:

By itself, the UND logo seems pretty respectful. By comparison, it certainly does.

For foreigners, the American dream is to become a U.S. citizen, work hard, and become rich. Usually this takes many years. With luck, though, you can omit the second step and accelerate the process a little bit.

Shortly after Moses Bittok took the oath of citizenship on Friday, he discovered he had a $1.89 million winning ticket from the Iowa Lottery's Hot Lotto game.

From this article:

We Are The Champions by Queen has been voted the world's favourite song.

Yeah, ok. That's a popular sports song and I think Queen is the greatest rock band yet. But you keep reading:

In the global poll, We Are The Champions was followed by Britney Spears hit Toxic.

Wha, wha, WHA?! Though I'm somewhat pained to admit it, I kinda like Toxic. But second best song in the world? I can think of at least, oh, 1,951 songs I'd put before that – give or take 50 spots.

The piece doesn't say what the methodology was for the survey and I suspect it was a "poll" where you call in to vote so it's not at all accurate. Even given that, though… second? There are that many hardcore Britney fans?

Put little faith in the mechanics of American vehicles from the 80′s, but that Detroit steel is something.

Hunkered in a corner of Boudreaux's backyard, armored with boards and duct tape, the 1984 Ford F-150 survived Hurricane Rita with two passengers: Boudreaux, 60, a junk and anti-ques dealer, and his grandson, E.J. Martin, 17.

Boudreaux doubted that he could weather the storm in the mobile home he shared with his wife, Shirley, in this rural town about 10 miles southwest of Beaumont. As Rita took closer aim at southeast Texas late Friday, Shirley took cover in the sturdier house of a friend. Her husband and grandson stayed behind to prepare for the worst.

They stored valuables in what Martin calls his grandfather's "bunker": an old industrial container already jammed with rustic anti-ques. "My wife, she's into Elvis, so we put a bunch of her stuff in there," Boudreaux says.

Then he parked the Ford head-first in a cranny between his open-air mechanic shop and ramshackle sheds full of junk and treasures. "We put a rug on the front window, duct-taped plywood on the sides, and then she started comin'," Boudreaux says. "We got in there."

Four hours later, the hurricane crashed ashore less than 30 miles to the southeast.

At one point, "we felt a real bad shake," Boudreaux says. But the pickup stayed put. At daybreak, they found the mobile home destroyed. "Split it like a sardine can," Boudreaux says.

I wonder if they work for tornados?

In Denmark, a Pakistani man killed his sister in broad daylight on a city street in what he said was an honor killing. In case you aren't familiar with the custom, in some societies (most of which are Muslim) men will kill family members, who are nearly always female, in order to preserve family honor if they think the women have disgraced the family in some way. This is sometimes done for such unpardonable offenses as dating a non-Muslim, assimilating into a Western culture, or for getting raped (yes, you can dishonor your family for being raped not for raping – try and figure that one out). While this is normally confined to other countries, immigrants have been importing the practice to Western nations.

Such was the case here, although the story doesn't say what this woman's particular “offense” was. The stunning part, though, is the Pakistani community's reaction:

A so-called 'honour killing' involving a Pakistani family leads members of the immigrant community to reflect on the practice.

A Pakistani man's alleged shooting of his younger sister in a so-called 'honour killing' over the weekend has led members of the Pakistani community to discuss ways of halting the practice.

The Organisation of Pakistani Students and Academics intends to discuss the practice during an upcoming debate forum, according to the organisation's chairman Qasam Nazir.

'Many (Pakistanis, ed) are very disappointed that this problem has again appeared in contemporary Denmark,' said Nazir.
…
'We will try to find imams and other prominent people to get a discussion about this cultural phenomenon, which is not a religious practice in any way,' said Nazir.

How society could prevent killings committed in the name of honour would be the focus of the discussion forum.

Wow, they're going to reflect on it and discuss it. Where's the outrage?! The most they were was "shocked," which doesn't mean much. This isn't something you need to reflect on and it doesn't need any damn discussing. You condemn it in no uncertain terms, you vilify the perpetrator, you ostracize anybody who would think of doing it, you let it be known that your culture does not tolerate such a filthy practice and that it disgusts you. If the law won't be the deterrent, then the maybe the social mores will. That the community isn't openly expressing their abject abhorrence at this crime, as any reasonable society should, only leads me to believe that they don't think it's as "shocking" as they let on.

Feel free to read more about Pakistani honor killings at Amnesty International.

Michael Brown, the former head of FEMA, testified before Congress today concerning government action in Katrina relief. He was defensive and put much of the blame on LA Gov. Blanco and New Orleans Mayor Nagin. While I think those two deserve a tremendous amount of the blame, there were still federal problems and Brown still should have been fired. What's especially entertaining about the hearing, though, is the amount of political posturing from the congressmen, some of which is a tad ironic. Here's a sampling:

Brown's testimony drew a scathing response from Rep. William Jefferson, D-La.

"I find it absolutely stunning that this hearing would start out with you, Mr. Brown, laying the blame for FEMA's failings at the feet of the governor of Louisiana and the Mayor of New Orleans."

This is the representative from New Orleans who used National Guard troops to reach his home (which was in a flooded area although the house itself wasn't flooded) upon which he spent an hour inside and came out with a few personal belongings. The truck he was in got stuck and another had to be called out. Oh, and a rescue chopper wasted time trying to see if he wanted to be airlifted. This was all during the time when troops were still trying to rescue actual stranded folks shortly after the hurricane.

And in a testy exchange, Shays compared Brown's performance unfavorably with that of former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani after the Sept. 11, 2001, terror attacks.

Interesting comparison since Giuliani was the mayor of New York, not a federal bureaucrat. Shouldn't this criticism be applied to Nagin? After all, whereas Rudy took charge after 9/11 and showed nothing but confidence and calm determination, Nagin ran around in a panic and went on TV wanting the feds to bail him out by whining about them getting off their asses.

While I started a post on 9/2 on the botched relief effort, I never finished it. It was clear to me by that point that the main problem was a profound lack of coordination among all the different agencies and levels of government. Nobody seemed to know what anybody else was doing where. With such a massive logistical undertaking, you simply must have somebody in charge. In New Orleans, that should have been Nagin. In the rest of Louisiana, that should have been Blanco. They instead seemed to think that the feds should have been doing everything, even though the feds didn't have the legal authority nor did they have primary responsibility for the region. If there’s somebody lurking outside your house, do you call the local police or do you ring up the White House switchboard? Mayors and governors around the country should take note. Rudy was a model of what to do and how to act in a crisis. Blanco and Nagin fall into the "don't be this guy" category.

The LA Times has a nice little piece on the reporting in New Orleans after Katrina hit. It deals with the media feeding frenzy and how many unverified and unsubstantiated rumors of ghastly crimes taking place in the Superdome and convention center got reported as fact. All those stories of numerous people getting shot, raped, beaten, or a combination of the above have been discredited. Part of the reason these stories got so much attention is that the press loves accounts of chaos, murder, and mayhem. Here's another interesting angle, though:

Times-Picayune Editor Jim Amoss cited telephone breakdowns as a primary cause of reporting errors, but said the fact that most evacuees were poor African Americans also played a part.

"If the dome and Convention Center had harbored large numbers of middle class white people," Amoss said, "it would not have been a fertile ground for this kind of rumor-mongering."

So the enlightened liberal minds of journalism were more likely to believe these rumors because they involved blacks? The folks who are reluctant to publish the race of minority criminals for fear of perpetuating stereotypes were nevertheless prepared to accept that blacks could not avoid plunging into violent anarchy once controls were removed? This speaks volumes.

This, of course, plays to a theme. Liberals always think minorities need government aid, special treatment, and affirmative action in order for them to succeed in the world. Conservatives think minorities should be able to succeed on their own merits and efforts, and yet it's the conservatives who are accused of having low opinions of minorities. At least the conservatives think highly enough of them that that they should be successful without a condescending paternal entity to guide them. Of course, liberals tend to think that of all the common folk, but minorities tend to get it more than others.

Apropos of nothing, I came across this joke and laughed heartily:

A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling scream is heard coming from the bathroom.
A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar.
The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate what the drunk is screaming about.
"What's all the screaming about in there? You're scaring my customers!"
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my balls."
With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says, "You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!!!"

If you visit regularly, you'll notice I haven't posted much the past few days. Sadly, this was one of those weeks when real life intrudes on blogging. I should be back to regular posting this coming week.